Nora Grace Updates

Oh how time flies with a new baby.  I regret everyday that goes by without a simple post.  That being said, I am going to try and post something at least once a week - even if it is a picture and a couple lines.  This blog is my journal and I need to remember these precious moments.

Nora is now 10 weeks old.  She now weighs almost 11 pounds.  She's a chunk and we wouldn't have it any other way.  The rolls on her little legs are so kissable and her chubby little cheeks are to die for.  But what's grown the most has been her personality.  She is such a joy to have in our family.  This kid has a smile that lights up my life.  She is so sweet and when our eyes meet and she flashes me her wide gummy smile - my heart melts.  She can coo with the best of them and I love to hear her talk.  She likes to mimic me so we babble back and forth.  And let me tell you about her lungs.  She's got the power to scream.  When she decides she is unhappy, you'll know.  And chances are your neighbor will too cause this kid can shout! Sometimes she can be a little dramatic, but hey, look at who her Mommy is ... Right?

She has started sleeping through the night and I couldn't be more happy and proud.  She goes down to bed at about 12:00 and sleeps til 8:00 sometimes 9:00! That right there .. is a blessing any sleep-deprived Mom would be thankful for.  She makes it kinda tricky to lay her down some nights.  And what I have learned and constantly repeated to myself is that she is a human being.  She isn't some little robot that I can program and do things exactly the same everyday.  Although schedules and structure are healthy for infants - I think it's important not to become too dependent upon them because things won't always go the way you have planned.  I don't go to bed at the same time every night and I certainly don't time myself to eat at certain times of the day. Sometimes I want a snack and so should Nora at times.  Neither of us is perfect.  We are both two imperfect beings and we are learning together.  I make mistakes and learn from them and hopefully try harder the next time around.  I'm thankful for the Lord and his patience with me in taking care of his daughter.  I want to be the best mother I can be for her and for him.  But most importantly is that I know I need his help, and with this help, I CAN succeed and feel good about the mother I am becoming.

We were so lucky to be surrounded by so many friends and family as we blessed Nora on Sunday November 25th.  It was sure proof of the love everyone has for us and for her.  The blessing was so beautiful and I couldn't have asked for a stronger spirit in the room.  There were few dry eyes in the congregation .. from the female audience at least.  I can't wait to watch this angel grow up and attain all the things her father has in store for her.  She was wide awake and oh so reverent.  That was an answer to prayers.  The love and support continued as we traveled to the soup bar luncheon.  We gathered and mingled for hours and everyone doted on our beautiful baby.  That was one of the most special days of our lives.  Thanks to all who attended and shared it with us.

Nora got her ears pierced a couple weeks ago and I am so proud of her.  She shed very few tears.  I, on the other hand, was in tears.  I felt guilty for putting my sweet baby through it - but I am so glad their done now! She's so pretty in her little diamond earrings.  We had a similar experience at the Doctor's office for her 2 month shots/immunizations.  It was so hard for me to watch and I just wanted to cry! But she quickly calmed down again after the mean nurses stabbed her little legs.  Thank goodness we don't have to go back for another 2 months.

All in all, I can't believe how quickly time is going by and how fast she is growing up! It's so bittersweet every single day.  I am happy for her new developments, but so sad that she is growing out of the newborn phase. I love her so much and love all the time we have to spend together! She makes my life complete!

The Adventures of Being a New Mommy

I have had a flood of emotions since becoming a Mother.  Too many to put down in words.  But I want to somehow remember a glimpse of what I have been feeling the last couple days, as well as the feelings I'll have in the upcoming days, weeks, etc.  This little miracle changed my life in a matter of seconds and I will never be the same.  I can't imagine my life before her.  It's so complete now - how empty I must have been before.  She's the biggest blessing to ever come into mine and Stefan's lives.  We can't thank The Lord enough for her and her ultimate perfection.

After delivering a baby, I felt like Superwoman.  I was on cloud 9.  It was such a successful delivery and I felt a natural high of accomplishment and success.  I brought this perfect little girl into this world and I was going to take care of her.  The adrenalin of labor was a wonderful thing and it lasted for a while after.  I felt an overwhelming sense of pride over my new daughter and her absolute perfection.  I felt proud over accomplishing such a hard task.  Breastfeeding came very natural to both Nora and myself and that only added to my sense of joy.

We stayed in the hospital for the next 48 hours and it was wonderful to have that time to relax and get used to my baby and her needs .. and to show her off to family and friends.  I immediately loved my new role as a mother.  And what better was to see Stefan quickly adapting to his new role as a Daddy.  He, the one who was convinced that he would be a laid-back Dad prior to delivery, worried over every whimper and cry.  It was touching to see how much he loved her from the instant they met.  He stood by her side the first 24 hours of her life.  He was her protector, and will continue to be throughout her childhood.  She immediately had him wrapped around her pretty little finger .. and he knew it.  He couldn't be more proud of his new daughter and he showed her off to everyone in the hospital.

The adrenalin and excitement helped me to forget the pain I was in.  I couldn't be more thankful for those first few days in the hospital and all the help of the nurses and family.  But after our 48 hours it was time to go home and figure out this "parenthood" thing without the help of nurses.  We arrived at a less than ideal home.  An un-fit nursery for our little princess and a too-sore Momma to do anything about it.  Daddy made a quick Target run for all of our last-minute purchases namely the pack-n-play, diapers, lanolin cream, tucks pads, etc.  I began to feel weepy as I realized we had no dinner and I had no strength to make it.  Not to mention we had no food in our fridge.  I felt forgotten by my Relief Society sisters.  And overwhelmed with all the work their was to do in our home and in Nora's nursery.  A few minutes later, we had a group of visitors armed with their serving hands.  They arrived just in the nick of time to put together the pack-n-play, assemble my rocking chair, clean my kitchen, feed us, and fix-up the nursery.  How blessed I felt and tears began to stream down my face.  I couldn't stop them from coming.  I felt embarrassed for the condition of my fridge and Nora's room, but I also felt grateful for all their help at the perfect timing.  After all this much needed help around our home, they left and came back with groceries to fill our fridge.  People should know better than to make a new mother cry.  She can't and won't stop crying for days.  What a testimony of service I gained that first day home with my new baby.

The baby blues are a real thing and no matter how happy I am to be a mother to this perfect angel, I find myself shedding tears over ridiculous things.  The second day home, I remember being starved but needing to feed my hungry baby.  I ran quickly to the kitchen and grabbed the left-overs of a sandwich.  I quickly started to shovel the food in my mouth, and then stopped promptly in my tracks and started to bawl.  I felt fat.  I still had the after-baby pooch and cried because I was eating like an obese person.  Even though I was very lucky and gained little weight throughout my pregnancy, there was still a gut there and it made me feel un-beautiful.  I cried because I was embarrassed about needing to wear diapers.  I felt gross and icky every time I completed my bathroom routine.  I felt pathetic.  The reality of childbirth is not pretty - and that right there, is a harsh reality.  Luckily, the joys overpower these mini emotional meltdowns.

Life is so different now.  But it has absolutely changed for the better.  We are learning more and more every day.  We love this challenge and it's accompanying highs and lows.  With time, the icky side effects have faded, my skinny jeans fit again, and we've set into our roles as parents and the most important and memorable emotion is the pure love and joy we have for Nora Grace.

Shame on me

Shame on me for procrastinating my blogging. The baby came! Our Nora Grace was born on September 17th at 5:28 pm weighing 6 lbs. 8 oz. And measuring 19 inches long. She brought with her all the perfection a baby could possibly posses. And just like that my life changed overnight. What used to be about me and my needs immediately became about her and her needs. Bringing her into this world was a daunting task- but it was the most exhilarating thing i have ever done. I felt like superwoman. I feared delivery but i was determined to give it my all. I felt so brave and strong. Delivering my baby gave Me the most natural high I've ever experienced. And holding her for the first time I felt love I had never before experienced. I never knew it was possible to love someone so much in one instant. But that's a mother's love and it will never fade. On September 17th 2012 I became a mother and have loved every minute of it. I wouldn't trade this for anything.